Today, I got to see my brother Jimmy. We have not seen each other in over 2 years. The last time we were face to face was at my father’s funeral. (We have the same mother, different father.) It was good to spend a little bit of time with him. With him in Kentucky, and me here in Texas it was a windfall to me that he was driving through. After my prerequisite fussiness over had to meet up more expediently next time, we sat down for some pork BBQ and a chat. (Side note: Is there really anything other than pork BBQ?)
My father’s funeral was not an easy event for me, or any of my other siblings. (I have 2 other brothers, and a sister. Same father, different mother.) It was a his, hers, and theirs kind of family. My father was not a happy man, and seems to have taken certain pleasure in hurting those closest to him. Long story short, when my siblings probably needed me the most, I acted like a complete and total idiot. I left Kentucky the day after the funeral in a self righteous rage. The damage has been great. I have not seen any of them (Except Jimmy, today) I recently wrote to all of them, apologizing for my horrendous behaviour. My sister Terri, has been breaking the ice with me some since then. I haven’t heard anything from Gary yet. If I could point to one regret, one thing I could change, it would be my behaviour on that trip in Kentucky. I am not completely sure about the next thing to do. I am patiently waiting for insight and direction, and the willingness to do whatever it takes to stay in relationship with my sibilings.
The visit with Jimmy was wonderful. We caught up on this and that. I shared with him my want of converting to Catholicism. He shared with me that he is attending a Methodist Church with his wife, Ginger. I couldn’t be happier to hear that. Like most families it seems we have a lot of junk to deal with. Each in our own way, we are all trying to learn how to live better and happier than our parents did.
I think the best place for my junk, is to be nailed to the cross.
I love you guys. Terri, Gary, Chris, and Jimmy.