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So, I have been attending daily Mass at the church in my parish, St. Michael’s. It is a beautiful contemporary building. I have been going for about a month or so. I have a dear friend at work named Debbie. She has been instrumental in my walk thus far. Today I was able to attend Mass with her at her church. Hence the title, Holy Smoke and Heaven above. I mean no disrespect as I type this. St. Maria Goretti’s has A LOT of bling. It was astoundingly beautiful. For someone with a monkey mind anyway (ME), it was a lot to soak up. The ceiling, the altar, the Stations, of the Cross, all of it. It was hard to pay attention to the message with so much beauty all around. I did manage to listen though. I almost jumped out of my skin when the started ringing the bell. That was new. I guess I will have to read up more about that.
I have been doing as I said in my previous post. I have been reading about the Mass. It has helped tremendously. I will continue to do so for a while, I am sure. It is nice too, because, I have been going long enough that I am beginning to be able to respond during the Mass. I still have a lot to learn. I know that memorizing all the prayers and responses shouldn’t be my first priority. My heart is. Being able to remember allows me to be a part of the Mass more fully.
Speaking of being part of the Mass, I do have one thing that I struggle with somewhat. It is something that I am sure will get better once I am able to attend RCIA. The Eucharist is most beautiful. I do have to deal with a deep sense of…loss?, longing?, by not receiving the Eucharist. Deep in my heart this is what I desire the most right now. Communion with Christ. My first guess to hazard is that this is an opportunity to practice the virtues of obedience, faith, humility, patience and hope. If any other converts would care to comment on this, I would be more than glad to listen.
One other small thing, I hope she reads this soon. Debbie, would you be willing to be my RCIA sponsor? Yes, I’m asking you formally in the most odd way. We have discussed it some, and I am sure. I love you and thank you for being a part of my life.

Roy

p.s. I think your mother is an amazing woman.